LustHeart

Hello peeps, just updating my current post. Remember how I used to said, that I don't want a long relationship? I wasn't telling the whole truth. The truth is, I was afraid. Afraid of being taken down by feelings. Its my trauma. It is all because of my past. Ever since I was small, I'm always alone. I don't have lots of friends, because I'm not exactly the best person to be friends with. so I choose the easiest way to deal with these, I move on and choose not to be in a long relationship.

But ever since F appear in my life, everything changes. Its like whatever she said anything, my heart keeps pounding so hard trying to persuade me to follow her. Before I told her, being in a relationship is what I couldn't do. but now, all I WANT is to be in a LONG relationship with her. I guess, I'm can change. I just need the right person to do it with. Now I want to spend the rest of my life with her. That is what my heart told me. So now, I pray very hard everyday that we will stay be each other side for a long. Insyaallah, amin.

F, if you are reading this, just know that every time you think about negative things, I never hate it, i just want to change it. I know that you have experienced a lot of bad things in the past and i can't do much to remove all those past away. Just know that, right now, I'm here for you. and I hope you would too. no judgement involve. and know that, when I told you I've move on, I really have. all my ex girlfriends are just friends. not more than that. know that you are my first real love. you are the one i have been waiting for all these year. never leave my side. I promise I won't leave you. Happy one month anniversary! :)